The Camino Virus

I got infected with the 'virus' by different people around me, but first in 2015 by reading the book 'I'm going on a journey and leaving behind' by Simone Awhina. A beautiful book that describes all the different levels of experience of the Camino so beautifully. First the physical discomfort you go through, then the mental challenge and the longer you walk, also the spiritual experience. The personal growth that this woman went through in this book made me so curious. I read the book a total of 2 times and the seed was planted that I wanted to walk the Camino one day. I walked my first Camino in 2019, I started with the Camino Primitivo - the very first Camino in the history of the pilgrims, that idea appealed to me. This Camino is also a lot less busy than, for example, the Francés; another way to challenge myself to really get to myself. At the same time, the Primitivo is also a lot shorter than the Francés and this also suited me well in case I didn't like walking at all. Two former colleagues had good experiences with this Camino and that ultimately made my choice. With the golden tips 'if you think you've gone the wrong way, you probably have' and 'don't wear mountain boots' I set off. I found it incredibly exciting to travel alone. I could already imagine myself walking through the forest alone at night with anxious voices in my head, very scary! While I lived on my own in Amsterdam, I didn't even dare to sleep alone at home the night before, imagine. When I arrived in Bilbao and then in Oviedo, traveling alone turned out to be a lot more relaxing than I thought. I had a lot of company and almost missed the bus because of it. Well, the fear of being alone was quickly tackled. What I remember most about this trip is that I was dancing and singing out loud in the first few days. This really felt so liberating. On the Camino I looked at my life in which I had become stuck from a distance. I came from a corporate world that was far too rigid for me, it was all about performance. On the other hand, I did not walk the Camino to perform at all, while many people in my circle of acquaintances considered it quite an achievement. I walked the Camino to nourish myself with as few stimuli as possible and lots of fresh air and freedom. I was looking forward to it. On my Camino I also met my own Camino family. A group of Spaniards and Italians with whom I could barely communicate as the only person who spoke English, but it was a warm bath, I felt so carried. We sang and danced along the way and immersed ourselves in the local culture. My second Camino was already a dormant desire, when a good friend of mine invited me to walk the Camino Frances with her. Still, the decision to join was not an easy one. In 2019 I had ended up in a serious burn-out (I had not yet realized that during my first Camino) and my condition was far from fit. Because I still wanted to go, I sold myself that I could physically recover from the Camino, that I could become stronger again. Funny enough, the opposite happened, a third of the way through the Camino - just after Burgos - I almost fell over. I was exhausted, completely done. I needed a break and was eventually forced to leave my girlfriend and group behind just before Astorga. After an emotional farewell with my girlfriend, I was on my own. We both knew that this split was very necessary and were grateful for the weeks we had traveled together. I still remember exactly when I got back on the Camino the next day; that was when my Camino really started.